February 16th, 2009
Only Pulling
Is there anything you do, you just keep doing?
Transcriptorial: All this time I thought that I was pulling something / I was only pulling.
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Is there anything you do, you just keep doing?
LOL – yeah, it’s called “My Day Job”!
I wake up every morning and realize how much of my life I have and will continue to commit to doing something that doesn’t fulfill me … but is necessary … at least until I figure out what will.
Why not find a day job that will fulfill you?
… just need to isolate what that might be.
like?
I’m not sure … I’ve always had a hard time figuring out what I really want to do. There are so many things I like to do … I suppose I’ve had a hard time choosing just one, so I opt for none.
i am going through the same thing right now. i makes me so angry and frustrated. i have a few things in my mind i’d loveee to do, but don’t know how to pull into it. i hate giving my hours to a job that benefits someone else and not myself in the long run. i don’t eat sleep and breathe my job, i just don’t care much about it at all..
do you not have a choice?
i do have a choice. i just feel stuck in a rut. i was without a job for 3 months and now i’m trying to build my savings back up. i settled for this job i have now i got through a temp agency and its just not me at all. i keep telling myself lifes to short to be doing something you dislike every day. i know in this economy i am lucky to have a job. but its just paying the bills..nothing else. i have to get my stuff together and make things happen;)
if it’s not just you at all, i hope you’ll get your stuff together and make things happen soon lest you realize later it has already become you.
quite expectedly. ;)
I go through weird periods of time where I feel like that’s all I’ve been doing. I think I’ve kind of got it figured out for now, though, and I am thankful.
I keep checking. Just in case he remembered, just in case he changed his mind, just in case he realized he’s everything I’ve ever wanted. I know it won’t happen- there’s nothing on the end of that rope, nothing on the other side of that door- but I can’t help pressing my ear against the side and hoping. I mean, just in case.
I think I have pulled on that kind of chain before, too.
An activity I call “circling.” I wander my very small apartment, picking things up, getting distracted, putting them down…going off to do one thing, getting sidetracked, having to go back…this happens when I’m very tired, mentally or physically. I just keep doing it, unless I deliberately stop myself.
One of the signs is finding odd things in the refrigerator, where I have placed them in a fit of abstraction. Or emptying a bowl of water into the recycling bin instead of the sink. LIke that.
Breathing
Casting ballots, usually for third party candidates as neither USA ‘major’ party is worth a darn anymore.
Fixing these @#$^% modern discount-bin computers that break as much because they’re stampout junk from the factory as because their owners don’t know diddly about using or maintaining them.
it is the feeling I get when I am trying to create imagery of a spontaneous moment.
Indubitably I fail, as I had never witnesses the moment myself.
Satisfaction only comes (success) when I had a part in the original scene, as a witness, or as a participant.
That is my point of view…