Never Change
May 26th, 2008

Never Change

Should your friends encourage you to change, or to stay the same? Which do you think is more helpful, more dangerous, or both?

Transcriptorial: Don't ever change, you used to say.

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13 Comments »

Comment by Erika Subscribed to comments via email
2008-05-26 20:46:13

Depends on what kind of a person you are.

 
Comment by Natasha
2008-05-26 22:32:32

oh this one is my favorite yet. I think the best friends let each other be what they are, and give each other room to grow, even when it is awkward and painful for a time. also, I have a song for you!

 
Comment by Sophie
2008-05-26 23:37:53

I think as long as your friends encourage you to be yourself, it doesn’t matter which way you go. After all, if they aren’t supporting you, then what kind of friends are they?

And on a different note, seeing this post made me sad because I accidentally killed a butterfly this morning. I was traumatized.

 
Comment by Erika2
2008-05-27 14:23:31

I think change is important and inevitable. Where friends come in in this process is in reminding someone of who they are or who they are becoming. a person could get lost in all the turmoil…

 
Comment by Quin Subscribed to comments via email
2008-05-27 19:09:27

a friend should never try to change you, however if you are wanting to change then a friend should allow you to change, for better or for worse. then you can see for your self if it was worth it. it’s harder being the friend i suppose, who is expected to sit back and watch you change right before their eyes, into something that may not be the best, in terms of things one could be.

 
Comment by orinoco womble Subscribed to comments via email
2008-05-28 03:03:43

Reminds me of friends of mine who spend a lot of time trying to change their SO’s behaviour, hobbies etc. and then complain “they’re not the person I fell in love with.” Respect is the key, as Quin says above. Growth implies change–from within. Forced change from without is seldom welcome, and seldom lasting. Encourage your friends to grow by offering new experiences, but don’t try to play policeman or schoolmaster. Give the respect you want to get.

 
Comment by Sara
2008-05-29 10:46:16

I love this one.

 
Comment by Kristin
2008-05-30 10:02:37

A lot of heartache comes from wishing others to be what they’re not- whether that means discouraging their inevitable changes or forcing changes that aren’t meant to be. The best friends are those who can accept every aspect of you- past, present, and future. And the most gifted are those who understand who you are meant to be.

 
Comment by MalikTous
2008-06-01 09:46:06

Growth should be change – Change the errors, but try to keep what works.

 
Comment by Kaffy
2008-09-04 20:42:53

It’s a very broad question, isn’t it? What are we changing? Do we want to change? Is it change for the better?

I think, in this case, it’s both helpful and dangerous, depending on a lot of things. I think the main issue is whether or not your friends and you want to see a change.

I liked the comment Sophie made. “I think as long as your friends encourage you to be yourself, it doesn’t matter which way you go. After all, if they aren’t supporting you, then what kind of friends are they?”

However, I couldn’t help but think about how some friends change into things you don’t want them to change into because you originally liked them for who they used to be. Sometimes it’s sad, but in the end you realize you’ll change too and you will find new friends.

 
Comment by alex
2008-11-06 14:59:45

i don’t know about you guys but i’ve got incredible friends and we say this to each other all the time. its not that we love each other (and make no mistake, friendship is the greatest kind of love) for or in spite of our flaws and attributes its that we love each part of them because it makes up who they are, and that doesn’t change. people take up new hobbies, change opinions, grow new and more mature outlooks on life, but unless they stop being true to themselves (or never were in the first place) i belive they remain fundementally the same.

 
Comment by Amanda
2009-04-05 21:16:12

Always, always change. You can’t live your life and remain static. They’re mutually exclusive.

Comment by orinoco womble Subscribed to comments via email
2009-04-06 03:10:46

Change is the only permanent thing.

 
 
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